Democrat action computer / argument winner

Has this ever happened to you? You're in some situation and you simply don't know what to do. Well, this is a common occurrence for the USA's liberal democrats. Since most of them lack sufficient synapses, I've attempted to make life easier for them. This handy "problem / solution" calculator should save lives of Democrats everywhere by affording the typical liberal the ability to interact with others while leaving enough brain power to breathe and metabolize their granola diet.
It takes the guesswork out of human interaction, and assures that the liberal's political agenda is unbroken. Simply dial the shutter to the situation seen in the left-hand window, and read the solution on the right.
Print in two parts.
The lid / shutter snaps onto the base.